How to Write an Author or Writer CV

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Recently, I was asked for a copy of my CV.

A UK agent asked me to forward her a copy.

Cue my blood pressure shooting up…

Trying not to hit the panic button, I done some research. Thank you Google! Phew!

I asked some questions…

How to write an author CV? Things to mention in the creative persons CV? What do authors actually need to highlight in their CV?

I found this template – it’s worthy of a share…

Your Name

1234 Address, City, ST    •   email@email.professional.com   •   www.MyWritersWebsite.com

Objective

  • To obtain (fill in the blank: representation, publication, fame, fortune, etc.) for my (fill in name of work being submitted).

Publications

  • “Poem 1,” “Poem 2,” “Poem 3,” The Literary Magazine Fall/Winter 2012
  • “Short Story,” Anthology, Publisher, 2011
  • “Flash Fiction,” Fiction Blog, June 2011
  • “Novella,” Small Press, June 2011 
  • “Poem 4,” “Poem 5,” “Poem 6,” Prize Poem Anthology, Big Organization, May 2011 
  • “Micro Fiction,” Well-Known Blog, March 2011
  • “Creative Nonfiction Short,” Prize Winning Anthology, Credible Institution 2010

Work History

  • Freelance Writer (details, dates, clients)
  • Writer at Company Name (dates and details)

Writing Awards

  • 1st place for form poetry in the National Writing Contest, 2010
  • 1st place for creative nonfiction story in Credible Institution Award, 2010
  • 2nd place in Memoriam Name Award, State Poetry Society annual contest, 2010
  • Winner of Sunburst Award, September 2010 

Writing Activities and Memberships

  • member, National Poetry Organization, 2009-present
  • President, Local Writers Critique Group, 2009-present
  • Officer, Genre Fiction Club of State, 2007-present

Honors

  • Served as a judge for Such and Such Contest, 2011
  • Key Note Speaker at Nice Folks Writing Conference, 2010

Specializations

  • Professional horse racer, 2000-2009 (if project uncovers scandalous truth of racing)
  • Master Plumber Certification, Accreditation Agency, 1998-present (writes about pipes)

Education

  • Masters in Creative Writing, The University of State, 2005-2009

Author’s Platform/Social Media Presence

  • Over 5,000 loyal blog subscribers at FamousWebsite.com (i.e., Nathan Bransford)
  • Twitter following of well over 30,000 (Don’t even think of using this unless it’s HUGE)

Credit: Thanks to http://annieneugebauer.com/ for publishing this template.

***

Doing some further research I stumbled on this summary of what to share and also another template,

While writing a resume, the following points need to be taken care of:

Objective statement – This section underlines your objective behind applying for the specific job. This is what the reader will first read in any resume and this is what should impress him. The applicant’s objective should be aligned with the objectives of the company in which he is applying.

Profile summary – This is the part where you write and summarize all the important points of your entire professional career. This, in short, is a part which concisely describes your abilities and USP.

Skills summary – Write a collective account of all your professional skills under this heading. This is used as a precedent by the reader in deciding whether you are capable enough and apt for the job at hand. Use bullet points in this section and don’t over populate it. Make it a point to keep the sentences short and crisp.

Work Experience – In a reverse chronological form, encapsulate the details regarding all your past and current companies and the respective posts you have worked at. Also, mention the important responsibilities handled by you at each job position.

Educational Qualifications – In the same way as the ‘work experience’ section, give the names of all the courses that you have completed along with the names of the respective colleges or universities.

Achievements – As the name suggests, this section is for stating your industry achievements – any awards, recognition, special mention, outstanding work, etc.

References – Include this section if you are asked to include references in the resume by the hiring company.

Here is a sample of author resume for your reference.



John Flynn
123, Utopia Boulevard
Boston, MA, 01234
(123) 422-1234
john.flynn@example.com


Objective Statement:

To write good and self-realization books for the readers and reach out to the people in ways that money can’t.

Profile Summary:

  • Published author of 2 titles till date
  • 2 years of professional experience with TIME Magazine, LA as a writer and sub-editor
  • Worked as a professor of economics in XYZ University, CA. Highly motivated individual with great interest in history and economics
  • Extremely driven towards writing good literature for the readers

Skills Summary:

  • Good in English language, both written and verbal
  • Excellent time management skills and ability to finish drafts within the given deadline period
  • Team player – always works with the editors in a coordinated and professional manner
  • Excellent management skills that I used and polished while my stint as a sub-editor with TIME Magazine, LA

Work Experience:

Author of:
The Cassidy Corner of Blueman Burge, 2014
In the Winter of June’s Place, 2013

XYZ University
Professor of Economics
(2010-2013)

  • Taught the students about macro economics
  • Conducted seminars on various subject related topics
  • Conducted classes for the MBA students

TIME Magazine
Sub-Editor
(2006-2010)

  • Handled the editing of business and other related articles such as those related to global markets and stock exchange
  • Worked in close coordination with the senior editor of the magazine
  • Compiled weekly reports for sending them to the higher management

New York Post
Internship
(June 2006 – September 2006)

Educational Qualification:

  • Doctorate in Economics, AAA University, CA, 2010
  • Post Graduation in Journalism, FGH College, CA, 2007
  • Graduation in Arts, FGH College, CA, 2005

Achievements:

(Fill out this section suitably with your achievements.)

References:

Ken Smith
Editor-in-Chief,

TIME Magazine, LA
(123) 332-0234
ken.smith@example.com



This is how one writes an author resume. If you have already written a book then, first of all, mention the book in your resume application. This will provide an added leverage to your resume.

Thanks to http://www.aroj.com/sample-Communications/Author-Resume.html for this information.

Best of luck with your CV writing.

Do You Want Your Book Reviewed?

reading

If you have a quality book in need of a considered review, get in touch…

Hi everybody,

I just wanted to let you all know I am now able to accept books to review. I will read your book and publish a review on Amazon, Goodreads and anywhere else on the internet you deem appropriate. As any author knows – reviews are essential! Well, I LOVE to read, so I’d like to help where I can.

At the moment, I am accepting:

Non-fiction (Family, relationships, cook books, love, friendship, popular culture etc)

Self-help/Inspirational

Romance

Erotica

Contemporary Fiction

Chick-lit

Children’s Books

*At the moment, I’ll need a paper copy. I can’t accept files at this time. I live in Scotland, U.K.

Send me a quick email to alanamunroauthor@gmail.com and if I can help you and review your book I’ll certainly say yes.

If I truly enjoy your book, I will publish it on this blog and encourage my readership to read it - that’s a lot of book lovers discovering your book. 

I won’t publish any horribly trashing reviews, I don’t believe that’s fair or good author karma.  If need be my reviews will be constructive and helpful. If a book is really not for me or badly edited/written I’ll respectively let the author know in private. I understand your book is your baby, so I’ll be kind but honest. If I can help you improve your work, well that’s a positive thing too.

Please NO:

Science Fiction

Adventure/Action

Fantasy

Crime/Thrillers/Murder

Horror

Westerns

Vampires/werewolves

But certainly open to most other genres as stated above.

I hope I can help you achieve a quality review!

Guest Post: Self-Publishing – Writing isn’t the hard part

Say Hi to Holly...

Say Hi to Holly…

Writing isn’t the hard part of being an author. At least for me.

Don’t get me wrong – writing a book isn’t easy. It takes time and determination, creativity and stamina to stick with one little idea or character and craft it into a full-length novel. Rewarding, yes; amazing, of course, but never easy.

For me, the tough part isn’t the writing of the book. For me, the most difficult and challenging aspect of being a writer is finding readers.

Marketing. Promoting. Selling yourself. For me, this takes up a good chunk of the time I’d much rather spend writing, but it needs to be done. Sure, I’d be content spending my time writing books and stories that no one reads, but it wouldn’t exactly pay the bills.

Being a self-published author doesn’t make it any easier.

With self-publishing, you do it all yourself. You have the control but that means you have to make all the difficult decisions. It’s not for everyone. With traditional publishing, things move slower and decisions are made for you, but there’s the justification that you’re an author ; someone believes in your voice and your version. It’s a tough choice and unfortunately there are no guarantees either will work out.

I’ve decided to self-publish my new novel, Absinthe Doesn’t Make the Heart Grow Fonder.

AbsintheFinal2 (1)

Holly’s latest book

 

How did I get here?

Once upon a time, I had an agent. She was nice and helpful lady; I knew nothing about publishing, but I did know I didn’t appreciate how she wanted my book, Baby! Baby? Baby?! to go in a different direction than I did. This included trying to convince me to make HUGE changes to the characters and the story, something I wasn’t prepared to do. Almost a year later – Bye-bye Agent!

Then came the surge of self-publishing and I decided to jump on board. Because I still knew nothing (hey, I was a stay-at-home mom of three – no publishing experience whatsoever!) I wanted help and made the fateful decision to sign up with one of the Do-it-Yourself publishing companies. I won’t mention names (cough iUniverse) but it proved to be a bad decision. I was naive and didn’t realize this company cared more about making money than helping the careers of their budding authors, and everything they offered came with a hefty price tag. I paid what I needed to have my book published but refused any marketing packages they tried to tempt me with. And they are still trying!

But I managed to become a published author. The day I finally held a copy of Baby! in my hands, I cried.

Unexpecting

Because of this experience, I wanted the validation of traditional publishing for my next book. Coming Hope was published by Etopia Press, a small press, in 2013.

Coming Home cover

But I was still intrigued by self-publishing and decided to embark on another writing adventure. Like the majority of the over eighteen population, I had read the Fifty Shades of Gray series. I had never read erotica, nor written it, but I had always included a few spicy bits in my stories. What if I could take those sexy parts and make them…more…

Enter Anna Ellis. I decided to attempt to try to write an erotic novel, but I wanted to keep it separate from my Holly Kerr books, as to not to confuse my readers (and my great aunt!) I created a pen name – Anna Ellis – and an idea for a series and got to work. The Husbands and Wives series was born. I thought these books would be the perfect way to dip my toe into the self-publishing pool without the icy grip of a DIY company around my neck. I had no expectations.

I was pleasantly surprised at what happened. I sold some books – quite a few of them! I gathered a bit of a following. In no way could I compare myself too E.L James, but I was quite happy with the success of my little series about naughty neighbours. And I began to soak up everything I could about self-publishing.

I made the decision to re-release Baby! Baby? Baby?! with a new cover and title in the attempt to disassociate myself from iUniverse. Baby! is still available in the iUniverse catalogue, but not for long. Any marketing I do for the book, I do it for the new title – Unexpecting. And I decided to once again go the self-published route for my new book, Absinthe. I am proud to call myself an indie author.

What do people think of Indie Authors?

It varies. Some realize the challenge of self-publishing and are nothing but supportive. Others will refuse to even consider reviewing self-published books.

I can’t say I blame them. Unfortunately, there ARE a lot of bad self-published books out there. I don’t mean badly written – I consider one best-selling author a terrible writer, but that doesn’t seem to hamper his sales! I mean books that are released to the public and aren’t professionally edited, with horrible covers. Those books scream amateur and the authors clearly have no idea what they are doing.

Neither did I, but I took my time and paid attention. I learned as I went along. My self-published books were always edited and I paid for professionally made covers. I hope I don’t look like a novice, because I know it’s those are the self-published authors that make the rest of us look bad.

If you are a self-published author, you need to realize it’s not just you out there. You and your book are representing an entirely new group in the publishing world. What indie authors need most is the respect of the industry and readers. It’s slowly happening, but with the continuing pile of unprofessional-looking books still continuing to clog Amazon, it really makes it hard for the rest of us! Self-publishing is a great way to go but if you decided to go that route, just make sure it’s done right. And support other authors. We’re all in this together.

Writing the book is the easy part. It’s what happens next that can make or break you, as well as other indie authors.

Bio

Holly Kerr writes contemporary woman’s fiction/chick-lit/romance and doesn’t particularly like talking about herself in the third person. Her books include Coming Home, Unexpecting and Absinthe Doesn’t Make the Heart Grow Fonder, which will be available February 17, 2015. Holly lives in Toronto, Canada with her husband and their three kids and when she’s not writing or providing excellent chauffeuring services for her children, she enjoys movies, reading, gardening in the spring and a nice glass of wine at the end of the day. She loves Star Wars, Harry Potter, Joss Whedon and superheroes. She’s training for her first marathon so she can feel like a super hero.

Visit her website to say hi. www.hollykerr.ca/

Guest Post: Self-publishing – The Positives and Negatives

Just publish it

When I was in 7th grade, someone asked me for the first time what I wanted to be when I grew up. After careful consideration, it came down to three choices: author, first baseman for the Reds, and teacher. Well, I could never hit the curveball, so the Reds were out. I never stopped writing, but back in my day (hear a grumpy old man voice when you read that), there was only one way to become a published novelist and that was the traditional route of finding an agent. So it fell to plan C. And it’s been a heck of a plan. I love my students like they’re my own kids and I feel like I’ve made a difference in a lot of lives.

But there was always that voice that kept telling me stories. Stories I thought were pretty good. And apparently funny. I’m one of those guys that people say is funny, though rarely when I’m trying to be. So I decided to listen to the voices (that’s not quite as crazy as it probably sounds), sat down, and wrote a book. It wasn’t nearly that simple or short a process, but it’s also not the point of this story. I wrote a book. I think a good book. I had friends read it and they said it was good. I had an editor read it and she said it was good. So I did what every author does, right? I queried agents. And I queried agents. And I—well, you get the point.

Did I mention I’m 51? While I’m young for my age (some say more immature than young), I didn’t want to waste my prime writing years waiting around for an agent to draw me off the slush pile and realize I’m the next Robert B. Parker. I’d read tons of websites and blogs that extolled the virtues of self-publishing. I kept saying that I’d give it one more month and then I’d take the plunge. I said that for about six straight months before I decide that’s enough one-mores. I self-published. And I’m glad.

Have I sold a million books? Nope. Have I even sold a thousand? Not yet, but give me time. I’ll get there. Why am I glad? Because, even though there are negatives, I feel like the positives outweigh them.

A big plus is autonomy. I control everything, from cover design to marketing. And I don’t share royalties with an agent and publishing house. Granted, the company that prints my books doesn’t do it for free, but it’s a two-way split and two is one less than three. You might be surprised to know I’m not a math teacher.

There are drawbacks. Autonomy is another way of saying nobody to help you. Or at least nobody on the inside. I like writing. I think I’m pretty good at it. Marketing is another issue. I was in retail just long enough in college to remind me to graduate so I wouldn’t have to stay in it. And even if I don’t mind it, there are seemingly dozens of avenues for marketing a book, and without an agent who’s been there, I’m guessing which ones work best. Sometimes I guess well. Other times not.

So if an agent offered me a contract, would I consider it? Sure. But I wouldn’t take it automatically. I really do like being in charge and having the feeling that my success has been on the merits of my writing rather than the merits of someone else’s marketing acumen. And that’s a cool feeling.

IMAG0129

Say hi to Joe!

 

 Joe Stephens has been a teacher at Parkersburg High School in Parkersburg, WV since 1997. He’s a National Board Certified Teacher and a past recipient of the Milken National Educator Award. He self-published his first novel, a soft-boiled detective work entitled Harsh Prey, in October 2014. It’s available to order online in paperback and Kindle formats, as well as from the trunk of his beautiful if somewhat dented Mustang convertible, Ellie. The second book in the series, Kisses and Lies will be out in June 2015. You can read more of his views on the writing life at http://joestephens917.blogspot.com/.

My Upcoming Book: Free Book Offer!

YouDontScaremeIHaveKids-Front

This is my latest book, it should be published later this year…

Hello everyone,

I’m planning on publishing the above book in 2015. Wish me luck with me new creative venture!

I am currently looking to ‘recruit’ people to review my new book. I’d need you to publish your review on Amazon and also your own blog if you can, but definitely Amazon.

I’d send you the eBook to your email or gift it to you directly from Amazon, depending on what works for us at the time. It’s not quite ready yet, but I’d love to note down some people who are interested at this stage.

So far, I’ve had some ‘test’ readers and they have ‘loved’ it and found it ‘funny, reassuring and witty.’ So, I’d love your professional review to get the book off the ground. As any author knows, reviews are everything!

Thanks in advance for any support you can offer. Please send me a quick email titled ‘I want to review your book’ to alanamunroauthor@gmail.com

Book Blurb:

Parenting – it’s hard work. The most challenging job you’ll ever do.

 

In this candid, often comical book, Alana Munro steers us along the precarious path of parenting. From the whimsical, life-altering decision to reproduce a small human to the awkwardness of pregnancy. From the indignity of child-birth to the every-day reality of coping with a part indignant, part lovable rug rat – she openly discloses what it’s really like to parent.

 

Munro has three kids and has a fourth on the way – she’s experienced (or is that delirious?) with a plethora of personal history. If your looking for comradeship among the chaos of raising children, this book is laden with down to earth observations, with straight-talking insights to get you through the cuckoo what-the-hell-have-I-done days. For a chuckle, she doesn’t hold back at her frustrations when dealing with other adults since having children. She highlights an astonishing universe where other parents, non-parents and perfect parents say ridiculous things and can challenge us even more than a grumpy toddler.

 

Munro’s painfully honest account of parenthood could spell the end of vague baby manuals preaching to us how ‘manageable’ raising children is. This book goes beyond the stuffy mechanics and sober advice, and instead digs deeper into the messy, woozy, exhausting and often side-splitting  reality of parenting. But what’s more, this book seeks to encourage solidarity and comfort for all owners of mini-humans. After-all, If we can’t have a giggle together, we’d cry and drink our body weight in gin most weeks.

 

‘If you’ve not had kids yet, you probably won’t want to believe this honest and delightfully liberating book. If you are mental like me and you’ve took the plunge, you’ll gobble it up. It’ll bring more relief than a glass of wine or two after bed time. I pick up this book and I know – I’m not alone!’ Emma, Mum to three young kids.

 

20 Signs It’s Time To Let Go and Move On

ZENPROVERB

 

We find out how strong we are in the moments of uncertainty life inevitably gives us. The unplanned events – layoffs, death, disease or divorce – can come crashing into our world at any moment.

Then the questionable life changes crop up. Should I stay or should I go? Should I buy or save? Should I forgive or forget? Should I move or not? The shoulds become a thirsty internal craving as we try to process the best outcome for our life.

The problem? In doing this, we often hold onto what no longer works.

I have a friend who is in a negative situation, and he’s hanging on for dear life because he wants to be brave and tough it out. He told me, “Giving up is not an option,” which so many of us believe.

But when holding on to something hurts our health and potential to be happy, we have to look closely at why we’re choosing to stay.

Life is a balance of holding on and letting go. We strive to make the right choice but how do we know when it is truly time to let go and move on?

Romantic relationships, jobs, even places we live have an expiration date. Sometimes we hold on to things that aren’t working out of fear we won’t find something better.

Perhaps our greatest fear is the unknown, which is why so many of us grasp, hold on and manipulate our situations trying to control our surroundings. But the outcome is always the same: more pain, immense frustration and ginormous guilt and blame.

To avoid the toxic outburst of staying in situations that no longer serve you, ask yourself if any of the following 20 signs apply.

20 Signs It’s Time To Let Go And Move On

1. When your thoughts go to memories more than the present.

2. When the situation causes you more pain than joy.

3. When you expect, hope and plead for the person, place or situation to change.

4. When you become complacent, bored or resentful.

5. When the pattern persists even though you tried to fix it.

6. When you feel alone, unheard or disrespected.

7. When the situation is holding you back from growing and being who you want to be.

8. When you stay, hoping and expecting things to get better.

9. When you cry more than you laugh and love.

10. When you feel exhausted emotionally, spiritualty and physically.

11. When you have lost your passion and joy.

12. When you core beliefs and values have changed and you sacrifice who you are.

13. When you stop having fun.

14. When you fear this is the best it will be.

15. When you force a smile to mask the pain.

16. When you lose who you are and stop dreaming.

17. When you hold on out of fear of the unknown.

18. When you sense you are holding onto something meant to be let go.

19. When the thought of being free of the situation feels expansive.

20. When you believe in a better life for yourself.

This list serves as a compassionate guide to help you make the right choice for you. If you found yourself saying yes to the majority of these questions, it may be time for you to take a step forward and let go. Trust your future and know you will be guided to happiness.

Source: Mind Body Green by SHANNON KAISER

Photo Credit: Banksy , expandedconsciousness

15 Signs To Prove You’re A Book Addict

Ever worried you might be generally addicted to books? If you have any of these 15 warning signs, you’re definitely a bookaholic too! But don’t worry about kicking the habit. Books are awesome.

Teenage Girl Reading at Hay-on-Wye Book Festival

Teenager reading at Hay on Wye under an umbrella Photograph: Andrew Fox/Andrew Fox/Corbis

I’ve always been a total book addict. I’m addicted to the emotions, excitement, touch, feel and smell of books. If I could live on books and nothing else, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

So yes: I’m a bit of an addict. Hi, my name is Megan and I’m a bookaholic. If you have any of these fifteen warning signs, you’re a bookaholic too. But don’t worry about kicking the habit. Books are awesome.

1. Over 90% of any wishlist (birthday, Christmas, shopping list) are books. Who needs food and clothes anyway? And if you ever go into a bookshop or library, you leave with at least five books more than you planned on buying. Oops…

2. Your friends or family chat about TV or film adaptions of books and all you can say is: “Please. The book was a million times better. I mean, the film didn’t even mention this, they changed that, they didn’t have this quote, they…” Double points if aforementioned friends and family roll their eyes and say “Typical insert-your-name-here”.

3. Everyone else you know has pictures of the latest band, movie or animal on their wall, but your walls are covered in bookshelves, book posters and book postcards.

4. Speaking of your room, you have so many books in your bedroom that they’ve spread of off the bookshelves onto floors, desks, chest of drawers and beds. But really, who needs to see their silly old floors anyway?

5. Most kids went as pop stars, footballers, doctors, nurses and superheroes to dress-up-as-what-you-want-to-be-when-you-grow-up day, but you went in wearing normal clothes with a notebook tucked under your arm. You also gave scathing looks to anyone who asked “What are you meant to be?” Because, obviously, you were an author.

6. Some of your best friends aren’t ‘real’ – as non-book-addicts put it. They’re characters from your favourite books. Your heroes also aren’t pop stars, movie stars or humanitarians. They’re authors. You look up to authors as godlike creatures who hold your favourite characters’ fates in their hands.

7. You have been mentally scarred by books (Harry Potter, The Fault In Our Stars, War Horse…). But despite this they make you happier than anything else. Until you finish them. Then it feels like your heart has broken and the hole in your soul will never be healed. Until you find your new favourite book…

The-Fault-in-Our-Stars-010

Have you ever sobbed your heart out because you’ve finished a brilliant book? And then sobbed more to see the film? (here are Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort in The Fault in Our Stars, but you know that…) Photograph: James Bridges/PR

8. You are the go-to-person for book recommendations. Everyone knows you read more than a normal mortal and that, generally, you always have a suggestion. Book addicts are awesome like that!

9. You can bring any topic back around to your fave book. For example: “Ah, the dangers of cyber-crimes. We’d really be so much safer if we all bank at Gringotts, where of money would be looked after by goblins and dragons. It’s really only logical. In Harry Potter…” “Oh, your boyfriend’s name is Eddie? He’s brilliant in Vampire Academy: I really love him. Have you read that yet? It’s so…” And so on and so on.

You also have a bookish quote for all situations. Wishing someone good luck: “May the odds be ever in your favour.” When someone says something about reality: “Of course it’s happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should hat mean that it is not real?” A dramatic, heart-breaking, beautiful love story: Snape’s “Always” and TFIOS’s “Okay? Okay.” I could go on – trust me… All your advice comes from books too – you just direct people to your favourite book on the topic!

10. You don’t have normal dreams: you dream about worlds you’ve visited in books, characters you met in books and adventures you’ve had in books. Basically, you’re all books, all the time. You even daydream about books.

11. You’d do anything (eat a poisoned apple, spin gold from hay) if you could live in your favourite bookish world – even just for a day.

12. When you grow up and have children (or pets), you plan to name all of them after your favourite characters from books. Poor Hermione, Augustus, Luna, Magnus and Sherlock…

13. You’d happily give up the real world (and food) if you could just live in books all the time. Actually, if you’re reading an awesome book, you do ignore the real world – you forget about water, sleep, homework and other people. People have to say your name five times to even get your attention and you end up sleep deprived because you stayed up super late to finish the book. But you don’t care because that book… it was so worth it!

14. When you’re trying to do revision for exams, you settle on this little reward system: for every two chapters of the revision book you read, you can read a chapter of the fiction book you’re currently reading. I mean, what better reward is there than a chapter of an awesome book? (Your friends say the answer is biscuits, YouTube or sleep. You agree to disagree.)

15. If you were freezing to death and had to put something on the fire to keep it burning, you’d burn your own clothes, pencils, shoes, food and even your own hair before you’d throw your books on. Who cares if you survive, so long as your pretties are ok?

To view the original article head to The Guardian.